Distracted

Luckily over the last month or so I have been distracted by wedding stuff. I am pleased to announce that my sister is now married! Wedding stuff is now officially over. :( Oh how I love weddings! And my sister's wedding was absolutely beautiful. I could do it all over again. Helping pick out wedding dresses, bride's maid dresses, flowers, cake....etc. I love it! I think this time, with it being my sister's wedding, I was able to enjoy helping her pick stuff. Where as with my own wedding I was a little more stressed. I kept telling my sister the best advice that was given to me: "Enjoy planning your wedding, even though you just want to hurry up and get married, you only get to plan your wedding once." (hopefully just once) Enjoy the ride.

I think that's the problem with life. We are always wanting to hurry to the next step or chapter in life that we don't slow down to enjoy what is going on right now. As a kid, I wanted to hurry up and be 16 so I could drive. When I was 16, I just wanted my independence so I could do what I want. When I was dating Marc, I just wanted to get married. Obviously now, I just want to hurry up to the next step and have a baby. Maybe with my struggle with infertility is trying to teach me patience to enjoy the moments before they pass me by. Maybe by the time I do have a child, I will be better at appreciating the moments of raising them, rather than trying to get them to hurry through their steps of growing up of "first steps, first words, first grade, graduation, married....grandkids."

Now that my sister is married, and my brother soon to follow next year, my worry is that they will start having kids before me. And that I will have to watch them move on with their lives with families, while Marc and I continue to struggle. It's already hard to see friends pregnant, ( I avoid them more because they are prego) I don't know how I will handle having my own siblings have babies. Not that I wish infertility on anyone. I'd hate to see my sisters go through the same thing I've gone through. But I don't want to avoid my sisters because they are prego.